Have you ever struggled to get past a vague sense of hurt, or a gut-wrenching life experience? People sometimes feel stuck with the same old job, the same pain or fear, or the same daily grind. Maybe, deep down, you feel you’re not good enough, worthy, or capable of a better life. Such self-limiting behaviors may be after-effects of trauma. A therapeutic treatment to heal deep trauma is Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, or EMDR.Continue reading
Feeling confident and attractive in today’s world is a huge challenge for all of us. Images, voices and messages from mainstream media can get in our heads, holding us up to impossible standards. Self-acceptance and healthy sex after trauma can be even more challenging for those with a history of sexual abuse. Add those unrealistic ideals to past abuse or trauma, which lends itself to a negative self-concept, and a person can be left struggling with a very painful self-image.Continue reading
Sexual trauma, abuse and violence affects a huge number of people — maybe even you or someone you know. Nearly 1/2 of women and 1 in 4 men report having endured sexual violence at some time in their lives (reports the National Sexual Violence Resource Center). One in 2 trans-identifying people report experiencing sexual violence, says the Center for Family Justice. Survivors face a huge challenge to enjoy healthy sex after sexual trauma.
Past sexual trauma undoubtedly impacts a person’s view of sex in the future—even if they are having sex now in a healthy, secure relationship. How do you enjoy healthy sex and intimate relationships if earlier trauma triggers terror or confusion around sex? Continue reading
Chances are, many of you reading this have experienced sexual violence or know someone who has. Unfortunately, intense shame around sex confuses the path to healing for many people who have experienced trauma.
Self-care is one of the most important aspects of living a full life! It is a much needed strength to learn in healing trauma. Unfortunately, many trauma-survivors struggle to see their own needs for self-care.
As a trauma-informed therapist, I talk about secure attachment because it’s the ideal model for the basis of any healthy relationship. Your earliest attachments with parents or caregivers shape your abilities and expectations for relationships throughout life. Your first relationships impact how your sense of self develops, and how you see relationships working.
I just saw Dear Evan Hansen on Broadway. As a therapist, I’m so excited to see a Broadway musical explore the world of social anxiety and mental illness with such care. What a remarkable show! I admire Dear Evan Hansen for presenting mental health issues and the stigma around them, with humanity and compassion. Continue reading
We all long to feel loved and accepted for who we are. To be seen and comforted in our distress feels soothing and deeply affirming. Emotional support like this is a good sign of secure attachment. When you know your wellbeing matters to someone, that’s another mark of secure attachment.
Childhood is a critical time for learning and experiencing secure attachment. Our earliest relationships do a great deal to establish our sense of self and wellbeing. Knowing, “I matter, my needs matter, and my loved ones will help keep me safe” affirms a child’s sense of self-worth.
Accepting change can be especially challenging for trauma survivors. Since my office has recently moved upstairs in the same building – presenting change – it’s a great time to talk about it! Dealing with change can offer meaningful challenges and opportunities especially for trauma survivors. Continue reading
When I recommend the need for self-care to trauma survivors, they say it can feel like a chore.
Some of them even roll their eyes and tell me, “You mean you want me to take care of myself? Ugh. Who has time for that?!”